The MMA Post: 50 Cent vs. Revolting Cocks

Like most MMA fans, I've spent a good deal of time wishing I was one of those modern day gladiators we call fighters. Now, I don't really want to be an MMA fighter. My cardio is shit, and more importantly, I don't relish the idea of getting my head kicked in on television.

Mostly, I just want to walk down the ramp to the octagon with crowd cheering me on. I've thought a lot about how that walk would go. I've really thought about my entrance music. I think I have it down to two songs.

So in honour of this weekend's Elite XC fight, here are my would-be MMA entrance themes.

The Main Event

In the blue corner, from Queens, New York, the man who took his rap money and invested in a delicious sports drink, FIDDY CENT!

Everybody knows Fiddy's story by this point, so there's no reason for me to get redundant.

In fact, I'm not going to write anything at all. This song makes me insane. It's so good. I love how intentionally obnoxious it is.

Two lines for you to think on:

"Have a baby by me, baby/be a millionaire/I'll write the cheque before the baby comes/who the fuck cares?"

and

"Get a tan?/I'm already black/Rich?/I'm already that."

Wow.



The Competition

In the red corner, from Chicago, Texas, Belgium and various other places, THE REVOLTING COCKS!

The Revolting Cocks are basically just Al Jourgensen from Ministry and a rotating cast of other musicians. Rumour has it the band was named by an angry bartender. Jourgensen and some of his buddies were being tossed from a bar in the early '80s. As the bartender ejected them, he called them "a bunch of revolting cocks."

I have an odd relationship with Ministry. I never got as into them as most of my friends did, but I love all of Jourgensen's non-Ministry side projects (The Cocks, 1,000 Homo DJs). It's just his main band I'm sort of indifferent to.

This is The Revolting Cocks cover of Rod Stewart's "Do Ya' Think I'm Sexy." I have a feeling like there's a fighter who's already used this as entrance music, but I could be wrong. I know Jenna Jameseon used to strip to it when she feature danced. (I read that in her autobiography.)



As always, you should comment to vote, votes are due by midnight on Friday.